Im standing after a long day at work at a bus stop, I’m tired and have no place to go. There may be enough in my PayPal account to get a room but I’m trying my damndest to save money for a home or a studio so i can at least have alone time to be creative and maybe be a business but this Cov event has made my situation ridiculous. I eat a lot to have the energy to work and cope with being outdoors. I’m disappointed to the point that whole thing just puts a sour taste in my thoughts..

Social services let me down in October and my peers, I get it we’re all struggling but the next person I hear that says “we’re all in this together”… I’m gonna punch them in the face.

That’s mean, I know and I’m not that guy at all. I wish this never started and I was at home planning a creative campaign to inspire other artists to be more socially conscious. I think its it our duty to actively paint a brighter picture for the world around us; even now.

But I’m bitter right now, I can’t even get my peers to help. Not that we have that much in common or have the same point of view but damn.

I’m sick of all this political talk and fake ass people. I just want my damn life back and maybe give love a chance again. Fuck, I’m tired of pornhub and I’m doing my best to get my health up to par. Shit! There’s so much I need but I don’t have the time or the patience to go begging… fuck if I stand on the corner begging.

Sigh.. I’m on a bus now and once I stop venting I will attempt to sleep.

If you’re reading this, you must forgive my frustration. I don’t have the time to be fluffy.

I just want my home and someone to hug once in awhile. I know I sound batty at times but I don’t have anyone to confide in. So I guess I’m hoping someone reads my crap and thinks wow… this guy is pouring his heart out and wants to give an old fool some love; I know this is hard times for a lot of people but can I get a hug or a mentor. If I show you a picture or a sound …can you make me some money. I told “God” that I don’t appreciate being out here and falling every other year. I want to be comfortable and give to those who I have not been able to give to. My baby is gonna make me a grand dad and I’m just happy that she told me. She doesn’t owe me anything but I want to spoil the shit out this lol mofo. Sorry emotional subject there.

Anyway… hello world, I am Michael. I’m not perfect, I made lot of ill choices, a great and wonderful fool, social reservation somewhat shy (not really) bit I’m not the worst guy in the world.

Hello. I don’t know what else to say other than I need love and help too.

I’m so very exhausted for fighting alone.

Goodnight world.