Today was a good day.

The sun came to place my spirit in greater movements, I awoke duty felt and positive. I started my day with Guardians of the Galaxy, I got my speaker and sub from storage and enjoyed the movie from my laptop in the hotel room. I won’t have a room tonight, so I will bare the nights chill as I wander about.

I got laundry done and ate fairly well, though I know I must be frugal about my spending. I rambled on Facebook for a bit. Stupid stuff for my entertainment, nobody responds to me anyway. My peers don’t challenge me in any way… Pitiful. I need to get back into class I suppose; it’s really sad that one must pay to have meaningful conversation.

Aside from that I wandered the street, there isn’t much to do when everything is closed. I can’t even use my laptop because there’s no place to plug it in. This virus scare has people acting the more stupid. I got off the bus just now because an acid dealer holding a beer in hand and his girlfriend are defacing the “social distance” placemats on the bus and flopping about calling one another bitches. I moved because he’s intoxicated, carrying a large knife and has two dogs, three other friends besides his overweight girlfriend. Forgive me, size does not matter but it’s just to give a visual of the situation. He used the word nigga with his customer on the phone with no mind of a negro sitting across from him; I’m quite sure I would have injured and killed two and a dog but I’m not in the mood for drunken ignorance and I’m not that hard up for a place to stay. I got shit to do.

I’m now waiting for another bus, just so I can go to the Fred Meyer and use the toilet. I may go to the airport afterwards. I can at least charge my phone and laptop there.

I’m still upset with social services here in Portland. Everyone has money now but it’s to help families and people who “can’t help themselves”, junkies and the mentally ill. I can’t get help for shit unless I say I’m an addict and give up my rights to enter a “program” bit I don’t need a damn program now. I beat my addictions on my own and my independence is very important now… I’m going forward not backward. I’m the guy that should be starting his business but I’m in survival mode. I only have time to work eat and sleep on the damn bus, with the other jackass’s. Yes I said jackass’s… If you’re drinking beer and wine, talking about drugs on a public bus with other homeless people your a jackass. And let’s not forget my friends, no, my peers… Who are as useless as I am and the family I don’t have. It’s no wonder people give up hope. Fuck that. I won’t give up and one day they will be wearing a t-shirt with my work praising me for holding on. They won’t be getting discounts either. Is that mean. Fuck no lol

It’s gonna be a cold night, maybe I shouldn’t have left the good coat in storage… Shesh. Sometimes I just don’t think things through.

But today was still a good day.

Good night notes.